When we get annoyed or upset, angry or afraid, there's always a reason. We get upset, we believe, because something happened or didn't happen, because somebody did something or didn't do something.

If our Step 4 inventory was done using the columns suggested in the AA Big Book, the second column was dedicated to the "because." At the end of the third column (the column headed "Affects my ..."), the word "fear" probably appeared many times.

After we do our Step 5, and particularly as we attempt to work Steps 6 and 7 and Step 10, we start to see that the "because" doesn't reside in what happened or didn't happen to us, but in the fear itself. That's a major step towards figuring out why we get annoyed or upset. But -- in and of itself -- recognizing that the fear is the problem won't make the fear go away. So what will?

What makes the fear go away is our gradual understanding, from working the last three Steps, that we create the situations that lead to our being afraid. To grasp this with the heart as well as the head may be one of the toughest propositions in Program, but without it there can be no real peace. We create the conflicts in our lives by our insistence in living in a world of our own devising, where we have goals, aims, and ambitions, and where others try to thwart them. The only "because" is our wants and desires. Just as long as we cling to our hopes and expectations do we experience fear. And just as soon as we become willing to let them go come peace and contentment.